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[SATIRE] Democrat Proposal Could Completely Stop Illegal Alien Crossings At The Southern Border

Left: Castro Brothers/ Right: Illegal Aliens being apprehended in Rio Grande Valley

Representative Joaquin Castro has proposed a bill that has the potential to completely eliminate illegal alien crossings at the southern border as well as put a halt to all crimes committed by illegal aliens who currently reside in the country.

Sound too good to be true? Well it’s not. In fact, it’s quite simple in how it works.

The Bill is H.R.3776 and is being referred to as The Correcting Alienating Names in Government (CHANGE) Act, not to be confused with last year’s Concentrating on High-Value Alzheimer’s Needs to Get to an End (CHANGE) Act.

The text so far is pretty straightforward:

 “To prohibit Executive agencies from using the derogatory term ‘alien’ to refer to an individual who is not a citizen or national of the United States, to amend chapter 1 of title 1, United States Code, to establish a uniform definition for the term ‘foreign national,’ and for other purposes.”

What this means is that the government will no longer be allowed to refer to an illegal (contrary to or forbidden by law) alien (belonging to a foreign country or nation) by the term “illegal alien.”

Therefore, should this bill pass and take effect, we can say with 100% certainty that an illegal alien will never again break American laws- at least as far as the federal government is concerned. They simply wouldn’t exist.

According to a press release, the bill is aimed at respecting the dignity of immigrants [specifically who are flagrantly flaunting the laws of the United States.]

 

“Words matter. It’s vital that we respect the dignity of immigrants fleeing violence and prosecution in our language. The words ‘alien’ and ‘illegal alien’ work to demonize and dehumanize the migrant community. They should have no place in our government’s description of human beings.”

You can’t claim that an illegal alien crossed the border or killed an American citizen in a drunk driving incident if you can’t say the phrase “illegal alien?”

Check and mate!

Will this bill have any effect on stopping the out of control border crossings that have resulted in the deaths and sexual assault of many who make the difficult and deadly trip? Nope.

Will this bill result in border agents getting the funding they desperately need to handle the growing influx of illegal aliens? Nope.

In fact, this bill really does nothing to handle the crisis at the Southern border.

But at least we have a Democratic congressman who is working hard to protect the feelings of those who break American laws.

Image Source: Wikimedia Commons  Source: The Daily Caller

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